We may eat for survival, but cooking should be an enjoyable experience, and these kitchen gadgets can give you a little pep in your step…or sauce. They may be completely frivolous, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't own each and every one of them.
Bread Saw ($18.95)
Fresh bread kicks every sandwich up to full-blown fancy, but slicing a loaf is the worst. Yeah, you could just grab a serrated knife and begin lightly cutting, but that approach usually ends in a smooshed, crumb-filled mess. Instead, you should opt for—and hear me out—a literal bread saw. This gadget can slice up bread or bagels with precision, giving you that perfect, un-squished piece every time. This particular brand comes in a variety of colors so matching it with your current kitchen décor is simple and easy—assuming you actually have décor.
Popcorn Cannon ($49.00)
Pulling out a popcorn bag and throwing it into the microwave is easy, but cooking this snack like a sane person is so overdone, don't you think? Relive the glory of the Revolutionary age by loading that shit into a cannon. Yes, I said a cannon. The Cannon Popcorn Maker uses hot air circulation technology to bring out the deliciousness from each kernel. But more importantly, it shoots the finished product into a bowl. Frivolous? Yes. Totally awesome? Also yes.
Ax Pizza Cutter ($9.00)
You’ve just finished cooking the perfect hot, cheesy pizza, and now you have to slice it up for easy eating. Sure, a “regular” pizza cutter will “do,” but why use it when you can whip out an ax instead? Put on your favorite flannel shirt and tap into your inner lumberjack as you divide that sucker up.
Tattoo Sleeve Oven Mitt $11.49
Never got that awesome sleeve tattoo with the ship and flaming heart? Well honestly, you dodged a bullet with that one. Thankfully, you can live out your misguided dreams with a tattoo sleeve oven mitt that has every cliche design you’ve ever wanted.
Ice Shot Glasses ($9.47)
I’m making a stand here and now—shots should not be warm. The only heat you should feel is from the burn of alcohol and the sting of regret. Keep your boozing cool by buying this Cool Shooters Ice Shot Glass Mold. It makes four shot glass-sized containers, and it's sure to keep your tequila, vodka, or whatever as cool as ice.
Literally.
I’m not even apologizing for the horrible pun.
Carrot Peeler Sharpener ($1.97)
Forget your regular carrot peeler—a real chef knows that carrots are vaguely pencil-shaped and should be treated as such. Whether you want them sharpened, curled, or just plain peeled, Karoto’s Carrot Sharpener and Peeler is the gadget you need to add unnecessary flair to your vegetables. As you peel, store your waste in a Ziploc bag and throw it in the freezer. The peelings can later make fantastic vegetable stock, and if you're reading this article, we're sure you're a practical-minded chef like that.
Spartan Knife Block ($59.95)
The movie 300 wasn’t the best in the world, but those soldiers knew how to handle blades. There’s no doubt that this Spartan Knife Block will keep your knives safe, secure, and ready for any cutlery battle you may encounter. It’s made of high-quality laminated birch that will last generations. After this, your next quest is to find knives that are actually worthy of this knife block.
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